im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
