the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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