fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Tell her she can't have a vagina
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
