god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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