That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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