these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
