every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
