I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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