is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize