I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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