I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
