Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
