Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
