I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
