i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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