So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
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