New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
The uberlube is also flammable
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
