the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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