All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
