could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize