I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
