so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
