I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
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All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
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I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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