Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
