Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
