I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize