I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
