I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
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And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
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Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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