so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
