You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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