Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
