i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
