whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize
