Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize