she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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