Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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