craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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