put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I faked an abortion last night.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize