i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
