Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
