Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
And the cops told us we were all naked.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
