so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
