Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
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