is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
dude i'm inner monologue high
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
