that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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