fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
