at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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