Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Im part way to drunk.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
