I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
