I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
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