Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize
