i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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